Barnyard Beats Lover Gifts

"He loves country music."

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

Cow Show Tunes

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

Moo! OOM!

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

Wife to husband dressed as pantomime cow: 'I know you're exhausted, love, but at least the panto season is now ... BEHIND YOU!!'

Ham-Dram

Pig tails connected. Title: 'Where Sausage Links Begin'

'Your barn door's open.'

'With a herd of three cows it doesn't take long for inventory, does it, Dad?'

Christmas Cow.

"I not only have to wake up the cows, I have to wake up the rooster."

"I didn't mean to trample him. How do you say 'my bad' in human?"

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

'I've been experiencing a lot of deja moo.'

'Orchestra Pit Bull.'

'First of all, I want you to know that my door is always open...'

"I stink... therefore, I am."

"be-be-be-be"

'No. I insist. You first.'

"We need less cowbell!"

'Is it slop yet?'

"Dad...how do you know when to stop?"

'I have to face it Irma, I haven't laid an egg in a week now: I'm menopausal...'

'Abandon Sheep.'

Sheep Ballast

Barn Wedding

"You're free to range. Just stay away from that Tiffany—she's trouble."

"I believe in eggs, and I think that you all believe in eggs, too!"

'Come on girls, can you at least pretend I rule the roost when the farmer is around...'

"I just try to do my part- camembert, brie, Velveeta - Those are marketing decisions.''

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?