Banking Blunders Appreciators Gifts

'Ok, you want 40 dollars. That's two 10s and six 5s - no, it's three 10s and nine... wait that's not right. Rats! I never was any good at math!'

"Oh, no - Karen baked a cake so dense that not even light can escape."

'The bank says they're freezing my assets! I don't understand: They've always been frozen...'

Standard & Poor

Bank Robbery Statistics

'Miss Roberts, turn off the video camera!'

"You want to withdraw your money? There's a fee for that."

Eye Bank.

'George has us well diversified. We own every stock in the Misfortune 500.'

'Your check to 'Hooters' bounced, ironically enought.'

'We're worried about your ability to lend us money.'

Unleashing the dogs of regulation.

'Oog decided to become a predatory LENDER.'

Thumbs Up Banker

Your Money Back if and when We Feel Like It.

'No can do, pal.'

'Oh well, at least it's breaking up the banks.'

HSBC Scandal

Forgot My Mother's Maiden Name.

'You asked for your bank account balance...it just went 'poof' and dripped down to zero!'

'Today stocks tumbled on the rumor that there is no Santa Claus.'

"How do ya like that? They rejected our request that they build the new stadium out here!"

'Doctor, you must help me...I seem to be hopelessly accident prone...' (Patient somehow gets covered in doctors ink)

FIRST NATIONAL, TELLER, 'Thirty-seven dollars? -- you call THAT overdrawn?'

"I discovered this fantastic accountant, who knew all the angles, fot my tax liabilities down to almost nil, and even had the Inland Revenue owning me money. Unfortunately, the Inland Revenue discovered him shortly afterwards."

"The main reason Bob trades on-line is his dumb mistakes remain anonymous."

Bank manager standing in front of safe has combination written on his hand

"Everyone said we're crazy to hike a snake charmer, but he's out top fund manager."

'Why do the bad things that happen to stupid investors always happen to me?'

'What do you want the money for?'

Servant who has broken her mistress' new milk jug

'I'm back! Do you have any free samples today?'

Bank. Statements and Accounts. Statement. I'm not getting any return on my account, but a lot of my checks are coming back.

The Politics of Unemployment

'And on the eighth day, God had a piece of clay left over. . . so he made a banker and. . .'