Bank Aficionado Gifts

Tall and Big Men's Bank

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

A Q&A with President Obama over jobs

"What's a debenture?"

"I've just never worked anyplace where the 'alpha male' was a woman."

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

"I know other hospitals are worried about the superbug, but ours is the only one that understands the accounts system."

"In the event of an actual S.E.C. investigation, legal representation will drop from the ceiling."

"Damnit, executive-trainees don't have 'accidents'."

'My husband is very sensitive. He cries when he sees sunsets, old romantic films, and falling values of his 401(k)'

Crony Capitalism (Always Follow the Money Trail)

"You're a fine one to talk about my spending!"

Stock market investment advice

Cash Machines From Across the Land

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

'Mixed news from the federal reserve...interest rates will drop on savings but will go up on loans.'

Big Shot/Bigger Shot.

The burden of carrying the Euro.

'There are only three things that matter in this world, son... bottom line...'

"The only good news this year, gentlemen, is our massive bonuses."

'They say a fool and his money are soon parted. Here's a list of fools. Make it happen.'

'Check with legal and find out -- maybe we're a non-profit.'

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

'Dad, I know all about the birds and the bees; explain stock-swaps and derivatives.'

Economy.

'The rich get richer, but what do the poor get?'

'Dow, Jones, Russell & Nikkei - Leading economic indicators.'

"Getting back into the market can be stressful. I recommend a portfolio of sleep-aids, tranquilizers, and antacids.'

'Hi, I'm the ghost of your past, present and future stock portfolio!'

Pulling The Economy Uphill