Bank Aficionado Gifts

Tall and Big Men's Bank

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

A Q&A with President Obama over jobs

"What's a debenture?"

"I've just never worked anyplace where the 'alpha male' was a woman."

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

"I know other hospitals are worried about the superbug, but ours is the only one that understands the accounts system."

"In the event of an actual S.E.C. investigation, legal representation will drop from the ceiling."

'My husband is very sensitive. He cries when he sees sunsets, old romantic films, and falling values of his 401(k)'

"Damnit, executive-trainees don't have 'accidents'."

"You're a fine one to talk about my spending!"

Crony Capitalism (Always Follow the Money Trail)

Cash Machines From Across the Land

Stock market investment advice

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

'Mixed news from the federal reserve...interest rates will drop on savings but will go up on loans.'

Big Shot/Bigger Shot.

The burden of carrying the Euro.

"The only good news this year, gentlemen, is our massive bonuses."

'There are only three things that matter in this world, son... bottom line...'

'They say a fool and his money are soon parted. Here's a list of fools. Make it happen.'

'Check with legal and find out -- maybe we're a non-profit.'

'Dad, I know all about the birds and the bees; explain stock-swaps and derivatives.'

Economy.

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

'The rich get richer, but what do the poor get?'

'Hi, I'm the ghost of your past, present and future stock portfolio!'

"It seems to be right about this point that our company started going into free fall."

'Dow, Jones, Russell & Nikkei - Leading economic indicators.'

Pulling The Economy Uphill

"We rolled your account over, sir, and that just made it worse."