Badge Collectors Gifts

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

Policeman receiving an award of a truncheon

Since when do they give merit badges for gynecology?

'Yes, as a matter of fact you do get a badge for checking in here.'

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

Brian was very proud of his dog.

Military Medals

'I was in a camouflage unit, so this one is for Hide and Seek.'

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

"I guess I was a good shot, because I took down 50 Nazis...all by myself. That's how I got my silver star. Honestly, I don't consider myself a hero. I consider myself lucky."

"It's from my first fight. So make the stitches big so I'll have a gnarly scar to show off."

"The first one is for graduating from basic training. The rest are classified."

'I was in the catering corps.'

Generic Store: Sign in Window

"He wanted a heavily decorated cake for his birthday."

Happy Champion

Jungle Games

'I let my merit badges do the talking.'

"Knowing all the weather rock lore doesn't really count toward the weather badge."

"IBS isn't all bad. It was largely responsible for me winning 6 sprinting medals in college track."

'It's amazing! I'm a magician! I can make a weekly wage disappear in four hours!'

'Son...old soldiers don't die...they just get medal fatigue.'

'This biometric ID badge is part of the new security system. The badge contains my encoded retinal scan, fingerprints, and level of job enthusiasm.'

'For donating half my property to the poor, I'll get the 'Unselfish Millionaire of the Year' medal and a supporting receipt for my allowable expenses!'

'And this one is just today's grocery list from my wife.'

Canadians celebrate first Olympic gold medal.

'This one is for not hinting in T.V. interviews that Burma's pacifists should be send WMPs.'

'What's with the cocoa tin lid?'

Vampire laying in his coffin wearing a Smiley badge.

"I wonder if this will count for wood carving badge?"

"And this one is for being faithful to my wife."

'We're confident that morale dips resulting from the recent salary cuts will be offset by the distribution of these smiley face badges to all affected employees.'

"And that one shows my frequent flier miles."

'My wife gave me that one for washing the windows.'