Awkward Interactions Enthusiast Pillows

Hugs and knucklebumps don't mix.

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

"Hi. What kind of wine goes with fruit salad?"

"Ma'am, why don't you go ahead of me?" "Um... no thanks. Let's let this gentleman go ahead of us." "Oh, no... you ladies go right ahead!"

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"If you think the first half of this psychological test is intrusive, wait until you're grilled by me mother."

"God help us, it's that guy."

"All in favor of telling Anderson about that thing stuck to his lip, say aye."

Whilst browsing in his local flea market, Jimmy has an awkward encounter with an ex.

'Thanks to his brilliant conversation techniques, Bob had the shortest calls.'

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

Turtle Blind dates

'I should warn you, I charge double if you want me to examine both of them, Mrs. Jacobs.'

'Maybe you need to practice walking.'

"Dating advice from your old man? Ew, weird. Instead, let's ask Stinky Rick."

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

'Ah, it seems that I've completely misjudged the mood of the evening.'

"Tell me about yourself... what you do, where you live, the last four digits of your social security number..."

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

"Look, I know Estella has a boyfriend. I would never try to break them up. But it's not illegal to text friends...and we're still friends..."

"But he's no longer with us."

"So, have you two been doing anything reproductive?"

'I've never felt like this on a first date, Tom, you're suffocating me.'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Alumnae News

A man and a woman at a house party

'Hi, I'm Sheldon, and I want to speak to you about perception management!'

'Check this out Henry, the stripper has arrived.'

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

Bob had a lot to prove – which happens when you're wrong most of the time.

"Bob, when I said "let him sniff your hand first," I meant the dog."

'Boy...it can be awkward meeting the parents for the first time.'

Rudy, I went out on a date last night. It was a miserable failure. Sorry. As my employee, you've seen me day in and day out. You know me better than anyone. Rudy, do I, your boss and sole source of income, have some personality flaw? Or did the fault lie with my date. Feel free to speak candidly. Mother.

The originator of the office birthday party.

'Bill, I'm sorry to hear about your going into the hospital. Is it a MALE problem?'