Award Show Organizer Gifts

Winner! Surveillance video of the year made here.

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Showbiz Awards

"Oh, no - Karen baked a cake so dense that not even light can escape."

'And this year's 'Inquisitive Learner Award' goes to...'

Buisnessman Of The Hour - I'd like to introduce our guest but he is 45 minutes late

Win - win

'Sure you won 'Contractor of the Decade' five times, McWit, but what have you done lately?'

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

'Nine national treasures in one film! Start writing your Oscar speech, darling.'

'And now I'd like to name this month's recipient of the Dumbest Global E-mail Award...'

"Ladies and gentlemen, I simply can't believe that I've won this award. I keep wanting to pinch myself."

"Are you sure he tested negative?"

"I'd like to thank my family, but, to be honest, I'm pretty sure I could've done it without them."

May I have the envelope, please?

Barbie Oscars

"And the award for Best Product Placement in a Domestic or Foreign Film goes to..."

"I would like to thank all the big and little and in between people."

Giving an Oscar to an animal actor would put the academy awards into context.

Oscars acceptance speech.

'Just to keep everybody on their toes, let's can the employee of the month.'

"I'd like to thank my mum..."

Djargo.

"I'd like to thank everyone who believed in me."

'And the winner of the 'biggest loser in love' category is...'

Teacher of the Year: "Accepting for Susan Curtis is her clinical psychologist."

"The idiots don't realise that flying in a private jet is meant to be IRONIC!"

"If it weren't for the Botox, right now I'd be so sharing your enthusiasm."

"First, I'd like to thank everyone who believed in me."

"This should be interesting. . . they're giving an acting award for best political lie. . ."

Dolphin wins the swimming competition.

"I want to thank all the little people."

Base chapel.

"I think I just won Best Director!"

A woman bows to the crowd