Aviary Enthusiast Gifts

'If we upgrade the feeder, we could attract a higher class of birds.'

Old news.

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"Do me next."

"When is my next parole hearing?"

Servicemen.

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

"Trust me, you're not ready!"

'Buying the inflight entertainment system was a great idea of yours, Dear...'

"Just kick back and enjoy this. These are the nest years of our lives!"

"This has nothing to do with you ... this is between us and the tree."

WW2 fighter pilot with emoji kills

'You know too much!'

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

Pigeon Little

Pilot with champagne.

How about going easy on the carbs

So you're a mocking bird...

'Son, it's time we had that little talk about ornithology and entomology.'

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

Canada Goose Jackets

'Yeah, I agree: It's hard to impress females by looking virile and strong when you're all pink...'

'Will you please stop feeding the pigeons?!'

Cow Blue Arrows

'Come on, you can make it work! You're supposed to be Lovebirds after all...'

'I got tired of wet feet all the time.'

Spring Training

"I'm all for pushing them out of the nest, but maybe next time we could wait till they hatch."

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."

Cat tries to reach a birdfeeder on stilts.