Avian Enthusiasts Gifts

"Birds talk about birdwatchers."

'...and I'm telling you that Budgie sneezed!!'

Social distancing failure

Polly want a cracker? Lars want parrot dropping on head?

"I got tired of webbed feet."

"Why on earth do you insist on coming to this miserable, isolated, rocky, small island every year to roost? It's covered in guano! Disgusting..."

'She says she has a prenatal appointment.'

Cello with a birdhouse on top.

"Angry humans!"

Falcon Reads Book On How To Train Falconer

"Mom feeds you the other way round? Come on, worms are worms. Now open your beaks, you brats!"

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"Do me next."

Sign in tree from bird "next appearance 3:00 pm"

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

"Just kick back and enjoy this. These are the nest years of our lives!"

So you're a mocking bird...

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

bird interprets modern art

Wanted For Bird Watching: Reward

Alien embryo growing in earth.

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

Birds of the Pacific Northwest: Belted Kingfisher

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

Bird Torture.

I no longer migrate. It's easier to just telecommute.

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

'There's too many of us... I'm going to start forming a 'W'.'

Why would birdie need newspaper?