Automated Call Conqueror Gifts

'To figuratively pound your fist into a wall in frustration because you've reached a pre-recorded message, press the 'pound' key. That's what it's for.'

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

Rage.

Tennis fans queuing at Wimbledon.

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

Second lifeReal life.

"Hey look, my To Do list! I haven't been able to find this for weeks!"

The Devil's in the detail!

Test your patience, back in one hour.

"Must get a longer cable."

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

'Hand over the last one now kid or you're getting my fist for Christmas!'

'Watch it...I'm carrying a concealed weapon...my lawyer.'

Crop duster wanted.

Twenty years later, Kim turns the tables on her loathsome former English teacher.

Bring It On!

'It's about your reports, Mittens. They're incomprehensible -- It's as if you walked across the keyboard, laid down and rolled over it a hundred times, then took a nap on it.'

"No, Dad. All this belongs to me right now. I acquired it in a hostile takeover."

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

"You go pillage. I can loot from here."

"The only thing wrong with Capitalism is competition. Sign this non-compete agreement."

Man in office fencing with pieces of paper flying about

Star Executive

"Seven bookings and four sendings off, and that was just in the queue for pies."

"Me, I love vacuuming: it makes the dog next door barking mad! Works every time..."

"This next tune is a one-chord song about how hard it is to learn a second chord."

"Thanks for the offer... but I'd rather see if tech support can get my computer running."

"I came, I saw I takeovered."

'Now that everybody can talk, I keep worrying about what people will say.'

' Even though you can't make heads or tails out of it, let me assure you, it is, heads we win, tails they lose.'

Office Task Map

"Yes! I defeated the invading forces! I am master and commander... I am a warlord!"

What brings you to therapy, Mr. Park? I'm stuck. Dr. Noodle. I'm paralyzed. I'm not making any progress. Honestly, I'm lost in the trees. I've lost sight of my goals. My health units are low. Units? Unseen enemies are everywhere. I can't sleep. I'm not eating. You're not making sense. Who am I kidding? You're right. The truth? Fine, I admit it. I can't get past level 5!!! I don't do video game counseling. If my mom loved me more, I'd be able to find more ammo.

Phone Signal Problems: "Can you hear me now?"

Computer Gamers.