Tech Call Conqueror Gifts

'We're only ten tech support calls away from another free pizza!'

Rage.

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Second lifeReal life.

A woman wearing a skin sitting behind a desk with a nameplate that reads "Sheena, Queen of the corporate jungle."

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

Why am I running?

'Of course, the toll on my personal life has been enormous.'

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

"Must get a longer cable."

"I believe he was the victim of a hostile takeover."

'Hand over the last one now kid or you're getting my fist for Christmas!'

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

'...and what's more, my databank has more data than your databank.'

Crop duster wanted.

Supermarket Merge

"I advise a slow, steady stream of lawsuits to weaken your enemies resistance. We call it time release litigation."

'I sent an employee to a motivational seminar once. He came back and took my job.'

"You go pillage. I can loot from here."

'He works in Acquisitions.'

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

National corporate ladder of success monument.

"Somehow I thought they'd be a bit SCARIER."

"No man's going to stop me from getting to the top!"

"Problem?"

'Buzz Off! I'm busy!'

'I've had tight deadlines, if that's what you mean by performing well under pressure.'

'Now that everybody can talk, I keep worrying about what people will say.'

"I came, I saw I takeovered."

"I reached Level Three of Super Mario Brothers!"

"Thanks for the offer... but I'd rather see if tech support can get my computer running."

CEO's office in a safe.

'I'm too big for 'Goodnight Moon,' Daddy. Tell the story about that business deal where you crushed the little guys.'