Attending Weddings Gifts

"[Ashes to ashes, dust to dust... oh, wait... my bad... I now pronounce you man and wife.]"

You're my Mona Lisa.

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

Sloaney Pony.

Demure lady with gloves

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

Lesbian civil partnership.

When Ted and Nancy would dance, it was as if they were the only couple on the floor....

'Of course I'll still love you when you're old and skinny!'

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

I must say a winter wedding certainly saves on confetti!'

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

"You may now kiss the bride..."

'Oh my God. I love it!'

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

A heart shaped cake

"You're the lid to my pot."

"Will you stand by him through humiliating revelation after humiliating revelation, and then-once you're sure it couldn't possibly get any worse-when even more humiliating revelations come to light?"

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

Wedding Day Itinerary.

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

Red Letter Days - A declaration of love in public

"The wedding cake as holy sacrament"

"Look! I'm going to be a customer!"

We'll have Manhattans...

'Well, he actually behaved pretty well for the first few minutes of the wedding ceremony....'

Happy Knife, Happy Wife