Attending A Football Match Pillows

Football supporters.

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

Football Chameleon

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Pregnant Cheerleaders,

"Uptight End"

A man cheers

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

Archaeologists discover a football

The commentators want to run the officials...

'David when we said we would like you to be a role model for us. . .'

"Before we begin. . . terms and conditions. . ."

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

'Now what?!'

'Well it's too bad you're not a black widow like me, Slyvia...'

"Yes, I've made three resolutions - not to drink less, not to stop watching football on telly and not to spend more time at your mother's."

'Okay, men, let's go out and win one for the flipper.'

'No we didn't get high definition TV - the wife dusted the screen.'

'Bad boy! Drop the quarterback! Drop him! Drop!!'

Red Card - Gold Card.

Referee cop.

"Go deep!"

Football Violence

'And if the scores remain level, you can text the name of the team you want to keep in the tournament.'

'We're in a hurry.'

"These guys stink. They're the worst team I've ever seen! What a bunch of losers!"

St John's ambulance member "I prefer rugby myself, more blood shed"