Athletic Training Gifts

'No, Jerome, that is incorrect... can anyone else demonstrate the proper way to tape a basketball player's ankle?'

"Walk it off, Butler!"

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

Football Fans

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

Church for sports worshipers.

"Portrait of a Lady"

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'Another football scholarship offer?'

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

'OK, everybody, calm down,,,'

10K Run: Smoker's Lane.

Pete Sampras

"I can't decide. I'm having a brand identity crisis."

'This wasn't quite the fairytale ending that Colin had anticipated...'

"It's Zeus' latest obsession."

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

"It's true: no more burpees."

Football

At the 2021 Religious Games

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

Raheem Sterling

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

'I'm not quitting! Who knows if i'll ever get another chance to break a hundred!'

Running

My coach wants me to go to soccer camp. Focusing on one sport isn't good for you. But mom! I'll develop crucial life skills. Let's see. "Landing endorsements, agents and college sports scholarships." The definition of "crucial".

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

"Empty again? What's going on around here anyway?"

A married couple share the same pole vault.