Aspiring Thespian Gifts

Articled clerks discussing amateur dramatics

'I'm being typecast, Max! Please NO more toothpaste commercials!'

'I'm playing a crowd member in the Easter pageant. I was going to play Pilate 'til I found out I'd have to wash my hands.'

'Good lick with your future acting career. And just to give you an idea of how tough it is out there, here's a copy of 'Withnail and I'. The uncut version.'

'Nothing doing folks, except ? surprise, surprise ? here's another for you, Desert Island Bloke.'

'You're doing a play in kindergarten?'

"First let me say that your father and I really, really wanted to like your performance."

All our servers are locally caught from a sustainable source — the actors' academy across the street.

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

'They all want to play the star.'

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

Sock Puppet in Literature

Come on! They're posting the spring musical. I can't wait! I want a romantic part! With and elegant gown. Good luck with that! We're doing "Cats."

Baseball batting cage theater La Cage Aux Folles.

"Devi's brew?"

Comic,,,Drama,,,Laugh Track,

Ye Editor. It’s a little downbeat, Will. How about making it a comedy and changing the name from "Othello" to "The Moor, The Marry-er"?

"There's so much pressure to like monkeys."

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

"Have a career, and then if you want to try acting, you'll have my blessing."

So close... Yet so far.

"When I grow up I'd like to model for a pasta company."

"When I grow up, I want to be a Presidential impersonator on 'Saturday Night Live.'"

A panhandler with a sign that reads "I'll never work in this town again!".

I'm only a part-time waiter, I'm really an actor.

"He's done it your majesty! He's turned lead into a screenplay!"

"Soon to be a motion picture."

"I like you kid, but you're really just a work in progress!"

Wizard of Oz Rehearsal Today. We'll have to have him lip-sync. He has a tin ear.

"Larry and Phil aren't sure what they want to do, but Michael is interested in show business."

The children who can't handle dialog will play trees and bushes. They'll be scenery and not heard!

Waiting to be discovered, or taken to work, whichever comes first...

I'm just waiting tables until I can make it as an actor