Art Week Gifts

'I have one just like this at home. My five year old son painted it.'

Frederic Auguste Bartholdi

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

Bob had to confront his fear of butterflies.

Victor Hugo

Diner.

'It appears he hit an iceberg.' (A LETTUCE)

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

'The portrait is a mark of his extreme egotism, but, if you curtsy and bow sufficiently...say, 'Oh Yes Sir!'!, to everything he says, you should do OK'

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

"Well....I could've done this!"

Antlers: A Deer with Ants for Antlers.

Mikado

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

A Macaroni in 1772

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

Cat statues on entrance gate

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

Painting taking root...

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

It's a call from Tate modern.

'Projectile painting.'

Candle Portraits.

"How do I know this isn't a performance art piece?"

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

Happy thoughts

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

Jackson Pollock: abstract; Picasso: cubism; Bobby: eight year old

A hammer in his den enjoying a cigar and port with his collection of trophy thumbs above his head.

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

'I just love this work from his macaroni period,'

Picasso: The Early Years

Creation of Red Wine

"Now this I get."

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.