Art Week T-Shirts

'I have one just like this at home. My five year old son painted it.'

Frederic Auguste Bartholdi

'It's called 'Oh Bugger It!' if you must know!'

Bob had to confront his fear of butterflies.

Diner.

'It appears he hit an iceberg.' (A LETTUCE)

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

'The portrait is a mark of his extreme egotism, but, if you curtsy and bow sufficiently...say, 'Oh Yes Sir!'!, to everything he says, you should do OK'

"Well....I could've done this!"

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

Painting taking root...

Child's Drawing (With Elephantiasis)

'Projectile painting.'

Cat statues on entrance gate

Antlers: A Deer with Ants for Antlers.

Mikado

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

It's a call from Tate modern.

A Macaroni in 1772

Candle Portraits.

Picasso: The Early Years

Happy thoughts

'I just love this work from his macaroni period,'

"How do I know this isn't a performance art piece?"

Jackson Pollock: abstract; Picasso: cubism; Bobby: eight year old

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

A hammer in his den enjoying a cigar and port with his collection of trophy thumbs above his head.

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

Creation of Red Wine

"Now this I get."

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

New Coat of Paint at the Sistine Condos