Art Misfit Gifts

"May I be candid, Hogarth? I should have thought a shrimp girl would make a more appropriate subject than a girl shrimp."

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

'And as my chart clearly shows, I don't know anything.'

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

"You'd think he hated music by the way he tortures it."

'Excuse me, I'm going to talk on the cellphone while pretending you're not here.'

"I expect you all to be team players - except Ted, whom I expect to remain team mascot."

"This is the murder weapon the defendant used, your honor, and these are the tunes he butchered in cold blood."

"I like that everything is mismatched. I just think it could be mismatched better."

'That guy is SO tacky.'

'I hereby sentence you to three years of piano lessons.'

"But aside from the lycanthropy, things have been pretty O.K."

"No, I've got nothing constructive to add. But I do know a funny joke I could tell."

Tone Deaf and Can't Read Music - Please Give.

'Stan, wait!... Wrong game!'

He's my vaguely familiar.

"Of course at this point, the egg salad went bad in the sandwich machine."

"Ah, Reid. You obviously didn't get my, 'you're fired' text."

"If music be the food of love, shut up."

"I don't think this guy is even remotely capable of getting a clue."

All's well that ends well

Rebels without causes: Lorem ipsum, T.B.D., Insert slogan here

"How is the new hearing aid?"

'That was absolutely HORRIBLE! When can you start?'

'I was demoted and they're making me wear this hair shirt.'

"Airplane Mode doesn't work. I threw your phone out the window and it didn't fly."

'I don't fit where I belong.'

"I mean, why even live in the city if you're not going to do New York City things?"

"It's the story of my life: A round peg in a square pants family!"

How about listening to music to help you exercise? Ok. I'll make you a playlist. Who do you like? Bach. Wow, nana. You are so hip! I haven't even heard him yet. He's an indie rocker, right? Very indie!

'Stop calling us monsters already. We're comfort eaters!'

"Those are good, but the fire department doesn’t really need a sketch artist."

"When I recommended you join a gym...I didn't mean as a member of the board!"

Authentic American Diner: 'Jello, ah said jello!'

"I said, you missed a belt loop."