Art Gallery Navigator Gifts

"I don't dare take him near the De Kooning exhibit!"

Madonna of the Pukes.

"I think he was a celebrity."

Culture Saturday

'It's a Joan Biro.'

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Personally, I'm a doer."

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

"Me? How about you go closer and read the plaque!"

Rodin's Browser

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

'From an aesthetic perspective, it has heart, beauty and intrigue, but is it a viable process design?'

The Cremaster Cycle

I painted them all from memory.

'Miss Donahue would give him an F.'

M.C. Escher Exhibit Upstairs.

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

'He knows everything about art. But he doesn't know what he likes.'

Curators at the Louvre Museum would regret approving the installation of a work on a wall behind the Mona Lisa.

Morning and Afternoon Paintings

Gallery book shop - Rodin's Browser

"Outré or simply bad?"

Art of Surviving

Congratulations! - You have been nominated for the Turner Prize...

Please do not touch the art. Please touch the artist.

"Here the artist opted for a more impressionistic approach, because drawing a tree is hard."

"It says 'Click here to enlarge.'"

"Hmmm...I wonder what the artist is trying to say...?"

Artist Retrospective.

"Is that all you can say - 'It's not messy'?"

Boy copying abstract artwork in an art gallery.

Art gallery: 'I think it's lovely.'

"It's a cautionary tale about why we shouldn't cut arts funding in schools."

His new 'Absence of Anything' reminds me strangely of his earlier blank 'Nothing to Say' canvasses."

Rodins rotten juggler