Appreciates Medical Irony Gifts

'It's me, Jack Gurkenman! I'm your ophthalmologist with the broken left ankle, doctor!'

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

Medical Building Directory: Dr. Larry Nix, Dr. Sally Putty, etc..

'You know bank pens never work. Why didn't you write the holdup note before we left?!'

Locum GP's to be paid for extra work on the BMA agreement

9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer.

'Are you writing my symptoms, or is that your autobiography?'

'Thanks for coming here today for my presentation, '10 cutting edge trends in the future of business analysis.' Copies of my talk will be available in the lobby in VHS and Betamax formats...'

"Doctors, Gilby, Beam and Henson. Ears, nose and throat."

Surgery Instructions.

Flu Drugs.

"They used to call them G.P.s."

"I have some troubling news, Mr. Smithson. You're in my parking space."

"Well your results would be normal if you were a 108 and smoked a 60 a day!"

"You have ice water in your veins."

It was only Monday...but Dr Davies knew that it was going to be a long...long week...

'When you said I had to come in for a scan, this isn't what I had in mind.'

The monster was surprised to receive a medical bill from Dr. Frankenstein.

"We've determined that it sucks to be you."

"You have natural causes.''

"If you don't feel better in a few days give me a call and I'll completely ignore you."

"The answer isn't more troops—what you need is an antibiotic."

"Thanks a bunch. I'll just run these by our committee and pass them along."

"My Dad has just come out of hospital."

'Well, I don't know how to break the bad news to you, Mr. Jenson, but ...'

'My speciality is referring patients to the right specialist.'

"And I suppost you've never had a friendly wager with a colleague?"

"These aspirin are for me. That patient in room 102 is a real pain!"

Your numerous prescriptions really have improved my love life. I'm dating my pharmacist.

'I had a great time tonight. I'd like to see you again in about six months.'

'The good news is that you'll be able to continue working and pay my bill.'

'This 32 year-old male was admitted last night with fever, chills, nausea, sweating and severe abdominal pain.'

"We still don't have a diagnosis for your rash, so we're going to run some more money on it and see what happens."

You have a low grade fever.