Appearance Advocates T-Shirts

"We need a fresh young face on the board. Simpkins, get some Botox injected."

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

"Yet she never gains an ounce."

'And she's got to have implants out to here.'

"I can't have anything that's a food."

'I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I had the whitest teeth!'

'I think my dieting may be getting out of hand.'

'Try not to stare. Father Time hot hair plugs and botox.'

'Sometimes I wonder how things would have turned out, if I'd gotten Mom's eyes and Dad's hair.'

"Do you have something cheap but with a really expensive label?"

'A neighbour of mine has just come in - put 'em in a size 4 box, will you?'

'I hate her...'

"So all these years you never did yoga but just walked around carrying the mat?"

"$68,000? You said that deceptive ad would cost me $23,000."

'Go on, I dare you. Put it on the boss's door!'

She's Not Heavy, She's a Heroine

Fighting Coronavirus

"Height is the only thing I'm capable of changing about myself."

A tight skirt makes a woman look slim!

"Actually, I don't read much, they're just background for my video calls."

'I'm sorry, but I just don't think you're cut out to sell real estate.'

'Anything else you want fixing, while I'm taking the mole off your nose?'

"We're not robbing any banks, Roger, until you pull that mask up over your nose."

"Excuse me...is there a dressing room with a slimming mirror and soft light..."

Bobo, you idiot – the mask has to go over your nose.

Do you have hair, um, rinses that look natural? Of course! So that no one notices? Ahem! Oh, right

Ew, I look terrible! Take one more!

A cow with Barbie's proportions.

'You are my best work.'

Chihuahua says to large dog: 'I'm on a diet - I want to be a size zero.'

"I'm not sure. Fat compared to what?"

Wearing face masks correctly

Gok Wan

Plastic Surgery. No, after the face-lift you won't need to walk on tiptoes.

Welcome to Umbilicoplasty aesthetic surgery