Apathetic Assistant Pillows

"Nihilistic customer service"

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

In basket-case.

"Morning, all!"

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

Good Luck!

Shake it all about sign on desk

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

'Fred's Office Supply? I'd like to order a dozen more desk bins and a step-ladder please.'

'Mr. Coleman is on vacation. Would you care to hold?'

"Call my broker, fax my accountant, and get my groove back."

"Thank god you're early. It's a can of worms."

"....how many kids have we got now?"

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

Not much money, glory, or praise

"Ever get the feeling you're being watched?"

A clerk asking for time off to get married.

In - Out - Pending.

"Do you have an appointment?"

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

InIn by-products.

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

"My assistant will show you the ropes."

"Miss Jones! Clear my schedule until I get this sorted out!"

'What does L.B.W. mean?'

Woman sat at desk whilst her shadow does her dream career of being an artist.

"While you were out, Mr. Sundberg, the little hand went from the one to the three."

'Chin up, Simpson, it's for the good of the firm.'

"Missing a call is no excuse for eating your assistant."

"I've been thinking, but I'm going to stop."

"Buster, run this past legal."

'I'm afraid we had to cancel the Christmas party...but the good news is that the senior partner says you can still come in to photocopy your bottoms.'

'Mr. Kibbles is out. Would you like to see Mr. Bits?'

'I'm looking for an assistant who can keep me in mind of how well I'm doing.'