Anxiety Artist Gifts

'I can never do anything with my hair phobia.'

A man jumps out of a window to avoid an injection.

Worry tank

Leave your troubles in the bubbles

"Fill me in so I can panic too."

"I won't be in today. I've decided to live off the land."

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

Worries of the first single cell organism. Should I divide? Maybe I won't like my other self! Maybe it won't like me! Two might be nice company. Three, though, that could be crowded.

Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

"I've thought about what you said, about how plate tectonics will kill us all!"

Thank You For Not Asking If I's enjoying My First Vacation in 20 Years.

"I'm having trouble sleeping through board meetings."

GPs to be encouraged to offer advice on 'lifestyle' issues

"I feel we're making progress."

"My problem is I obsess over whether I worry enough."

'One day he stepped back so he could see the big picture. Then he turned and ran like hell.'

Safe harbour

'Has the news finished yet?'

"Did we turn off the stove?"

MR. CRENSHAW, TIME FOR OUR TELECONFERENCE

'Doctor, I just can't seem to relate to my computer equipment these days.'

"A mouse! A mouse!"

"Since I heard there was a monster I can't sleep at night!"

Nervous man about to make a presentation.

"I sleep poorly anyway, so you might as well put me in high-risk investments."

"The feel of mud and weeds between my toes just really freaks me out."

'He has a doctorate in worrying.'

Room 101 Tax Inspection

'When the going gets tough, Pomeroy goes to lunch.'

"I only grown them because her mother's allergic to them."

Why hamsters don't sleep at night.

'All the stress of the job went away once I stopped giving a damn.'

'Hey, it's all right - we're ALL afraid of vacuum cleaners.'

'The action they're taking is early retirement.'

Pre-minstrel Tension.