Annual Village Fete Gifts

'My God! He must have been there since the last one!'

Prize vegetables.

A crowd of happy pet owners.

"He's taken buzzed to a whole new level."

"Where do we put Desserts?"

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

AA Meeting Here Today

See you at the farmers market!

Church Basement Foodie

"First time visitors should always check the seating chart before entering the sanctuary."

Abstract expressionist face painting.

"I've never seen Tia Carmen so excited about a grand opening."

'Details of the summer fete can be found on our website. The address is on the notice board at the back of the church.'

Maypole

This Saturday 10:30 Confessions of a Window Cleaner, Doctor, Nurse, Policeman, Shop Worker, Lollipop Lady, Butcher, Baker, Housewife, Schoolboy...

The Last-Minute Halloween Costume Parade

"I didn't even know Smallville had a set!"

'Are you putting on your Sunday Best, Felix?'

Vicar absent from church due to car boot sale.

"Hello. . . I'm new in town. Do you know where the local police station is? - I need to sign in. . !"

Hal is such a nice guy, every dog in the neighborhood brings him slippers.

Ventriloquist's fete

Tombola Winner

"Can we discuss this?"

57th Birthday balloons

'My competitor down the street sasses his parents.'

'For heaven's sake, Armitage... Can't you just accept 2nd place in the best leek category??'

Garage sale.

Annual Lump Festival Competition:'I don't know if I can give an award, they're all so fantastic..'

Wow! Look what you get when you hire a ride service right in front of a comic book convention!

"My family clapped louder than your family!"

Food Fight

'Hey! Kid in the blue! Where'd you get that BEER?'

"Oh, now I remember you. You live in that big shoe on the corner."

"It's been a rainy winter."