Animal Surgery Enthusiast Gifts

'You're going to REPLACE the prolapsed rectum?...'

"To slow for a spay, rigor mortis has set in."

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

"Congratulations! It's a bitch!"

Why can't you just chew the squeaker out like normal dogs?

'Stop cracking and hulling his seeds. He's accustomed to working for his food.'

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

'I can see a visit to the vet, but, oh my, no more kids after that!...'

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

'Let's cut right through to the heart of the matter.'

'Yessir, I just finished my first spay...but how did you know?'

"We're just going for a routine checkup ... they only do that operation once."

'Anaesthetic ok?' - 'Yes, ten double scotches from the pub up the road.'

An inbred poodle.

"Must we discuss your worming right before dinner?"

"Anatomy of a cat"

'Ta dum deedee dum -- DUM -- Bloop -- Fsst, tra la,,,'

'Animal Psychiatrist' (a dog).

'Just remember, you're not alone - I'm scared to death, too.'

"Good news—it's not colon cancer, it's tinsel."

Anatomy.

'I don't think the Doctor will be able to see any more patients today!'

"Well, we saved this attorney. Some poacher shot him and removed his highly-prized fin."

The Big Book of Really Hard Surgery

He really puts his heart into it!

Several of the med students had been cheerleaders when they were undergrads.

"I'm Dr. Fenton. I'll be performing your microsurgery today."

'Worst case of Prickly-Heat I've ever seen!'

Kwazy Wabbits

"He's so old I usually let him do what he wants."

"May I keep my collar on?"

'Whew! Five surgeries in one day! Well, let's try to make this last one end on a happy note!'