Animal Healthcare Aficionado Gifts

'I don't think the Doctor will be able to see any more patients today!'

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

Why can't you just chew the squeaker out like normal dogs?

'Stop cracking and hulling his seeds. He's accustomed to working for his food.'

"We're going to the Vet aren't we."

'I can tell you one thing, Madam. These ears have been neglected...

'What's founder?'

'Yessir, I just finished my first spay...but how did you know?'

"I need a hip replacement but I believe they're looking at a dog replacement."

"You say you're flossing, but I'm scraping off a lot of tennis ball fuzz."

Committee On Feline Healthcare

"Would you say the pain is more like a me-ow or a me-ouch?"

"Has he had all his shots"

"Must we discuss your worming right before dinner?"

Kwazy Wabbits

"You'll feel better when you see the doctor."

'Have you put her on the strict diet I prescribed?'

"It hurts when I warble."

'Under the circumstances, I feel that it would be best if you had another doctor!'

"First they tell you you're going in to get your bunions fixed and the next thing you know you're barking like a girl."

"I got horse dewormer..."

Veterinary Clinic. No, it's not a "wading" room.

'But on the plus side, I'm picking up HBO.'

'This time, Dr. Houston, I'm going to watch real close...

I'll take it off when you stop biting your stitches. Veterinarian.

'Gee, Doctor Dresher, you have a wonderful way with horses....

'Let's see...fever, rhinorrhea, chorea...Aha! canine distemper!'

"Leave the bowl."

"When will he be able to sit up and beg?"

'This, Sir, is what we call a Sertoli-cell tumor....'

"Fill out the form and have a seat in the waaait... waaait... waiting room."

'He doesn't want to get fixed until you do.'

'You think you need WHAT glands expressed?'

'It will cost $1000 to spay your dog, Ma'am, but call me again tomorrow at my office....

"It was worth it to get rid of the fleas!"