Animal Hospital Aficionado Gifts

'Fred just rages when he sees how veterinarians are portrayed on TV.'

Why can't you just chew the squeaker out like normal dogs?

Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'

"When was the last time anyone checked on Mr Klink."

"Satisfaction, stat!"

"These are X-Rays of your operation, and this is a selfie I took with your gall bladder."

'How about a little smile for me. You've outlived my prediction!'

"I expect a speedy recovery,"

Dog with toilet IV

"I got my PhD in Nursing just so people would have to call me Doctor."

'It's a statue of St. Francis of Assisi. I had it specially made for my hospital.'

Pay Hospital Bill Here.

'Get me a hundred milligrams of Oxycontin... And pick up something for this guy while you're at it.'

'As for the tonsillectomy...there was a little mix-up... In other words, you now have cup size D!'

'You're either getting smaller or they're giving you bigger pillows.'

"After losing my partner, I felt lost until I realized I had not only an empty shell but also a short-term accommodation business."

"You've got to move. The bed is needed for another TV drama."

'You can have general anesthesia or just be numbed from the wallet down.'

'I don't think the Doctor will be able to see any more patients today!'

'Tell me more! That's my favorite symptom!'

'We've been told to get families more involved in patient care, he'll need a bath and lunch in about 30 minutes.'

Kwazy Wabbits

Fertility Center.

Hospital Visit

'Naw, man! I ain't never worked in no animal hospital...'

'We've talked it over, and we've decided to hold you for observation.'

"I told you we were being stitched up. This consultant's bills are outrageous."

"Dead! How do you know he's dead? You're a dermatologist."

"C'mon, walk it off!"

"It hurts when I warble."

"First they tell you you're going in to get your bunions fixed and the next thing you know you're barking like a girl."

"Okay - which one of us is talking now?"

"Since laughter is the best medicine, I'm downloading the Laugh-Track App."

'It's going to take me ten hours to read your care instructions and your insurance only covers an hour of care.'

"We find the Rolf Harris tape provides reassurance for our clients."