
"It hurts when I warble."
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"It hurts when I warble."
"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."
"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."
"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."
'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'
"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."
"We're just going to have to face the fact that you're not a puppy anymore!"
'Stop cracking and hulling his seeds. He's accustomed to working for his food.'
'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'
Should've been routine. That was before the dog called and offered to pay twice as much to have the master put down.
Dog with saucepan stuck on its head
"We're going to the Vet aren't we."
Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'
'Now there's a vet that needs a holiday,'
'Can you give him something to relax his jaws?'
'This model is hard to get parts for.'
'Honestly, now that Tiger is neutered I'm perfectly happy just cuddling.'
'I can see a visit to the vet, but, oh my, no more kids after that!...'
'You see, we don't have any children, so he's kind of our baby.'
"Now I'm sure that, at this point, you're wondering HOW I can remove the anal sacs..."
'What's founder?'
"I'm afraid, Mr. Cottontail, that all that hopping down the bunny trail has taken a toll on your hips."
"Sorry - my dog is at the vet. This one is a loaner."
'Yessir, I just finished my first spay...but how did you know?'
Conspiracy Cat
'Who's next?'
"I need a hip replacement but I believe they're looking at a dog replacement."
"Doc, can you make my bite worse than my bark? You see there's this cat . . ."
"I am absolutely unable to pill my cat."
"He wants a second opinion."
'He wants a second opinion.'
'I've stopped him using the exercise bike...'
"I'm down here, Mona. That's your slipper."
'A vet!! Take Princess to a vet?'
'I heard him mention your name, what does neutered, mean?'
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