Animal Lover With A Humorous Side Gifts

'My dad must like you, or he would have charged by now.'

Dog Dressed to Eat

"This resumé has the kind of sizzle we're looking for."

Pin the blame on the donkey.

"And I suppose you expect me to pick that up?"

Dog wearing jumper to hide his spots.

"He ran out of pee."

"Would you thrive in a hostile work environment?"

'Your disgusting behaviour has been almost human in nature!'

'You seem pretty wound up today.'

'It's her signature dish.'

Pet shop with recipes stand outside.

Balding dog

'Wanna play? We need another body... er... one more player.'

What to do if a rhino owes you money....

'I never see the dog complain about my cooking.'

Ostritch Gangsters.

'Lately I've been feeling the lure of the stage.'

'And the winner for best supporting animal in a frozen ready meal goes to...'

"Animals can't speak and they certainly don't wear clothes! Damn fake news!"

"I've enjoyed being a pet, but it's time for me to get a real job."

'The ball of wool channel? Who the hell signed us up for that?'

George Michael In The Toilet.

'Saint Francis changes his mind about animals'

"We'll have the grilled penguin."

"Noah was having second thoughts about allowing the beavers onto the ark. . ."

'As a kid, whenever I was at a petting zoo, I got bit, butted and stomped on.'

"Funny hey, my mum's advice on 'travel essentials' is 'don't pack a toothbrush'..."

"When Human Resources said that we needed a more diverse workforce I'm not sure THAT'S what they meant!"

Mrs. Claus finds a job for Santa's reindeer in the off season.

I drink to forget... which can take for-freakin'-ever when you're an elephant!'

'Uh, i'll pass.'

'Are you going to remain quiet while I hit out of the rough, Dewey, or are you going to just stand there and make annoying growling noises?'

Good job we were still plugged in!

"You shouldn't feel too bad. I think it's remarkable they managed even one jump."