Ancient Warfare Enthusiast T-Shirts

Castle: "Who is it?"

Attila the Horizontally Mobile

"You guys need to #@%!% fight harder. You're all #@%!% wimps! You call yourselves a #@%!% army? Bull%#!*!"

'Hey Dad, I've joined Hannibal's army...'

Modern Siege Warfare

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

Sphinx cat and mummy mouse

"We're having one heck of a time building that trapezoidal thing of yours..."

"Well, that certainly killed my buzz."

Those Were The Days

'Evidently, one of them was a cartoonist!'

'But this is fantastic, professor! It's like no language I've ever seen before!'

"Here's the parking lot."

Egyptian chiropractor.

Mark Anthony on Zoom.

'They're relics of the many ancient civilization that have dwelled at Blisshaven.'

Trojan horse with a satellite dish.

I came, I saw, I partied!

Romans.

Closed for Renovation

"There was a time when I used to instil absolute terror into everybody..."

Archeologists discover Egyptian Computers.

"No flash in the ancient mummy gallery."

'Anti-Graffito' worker about to erase hieroglyphics.

"I am wearing sunglasses and using sunscreen with 50% UV protection. What could possibly go wrong?"

'Where does this go?'

'Barbarians at the gate? That's fine, I fully support social mobility.'

"The British are coming. Just sayin'."

'I think scroll sounds better than 'continuous media,''

"You're right! It is a mezuzah!"

'This stuff is a snap for me. I used to be a pharmacist.'

"Greece! Greece! Greece! Every day it's the same! Just the constant Greece!"

"Looks like we're in trouble now...he's got four bars on that thing."

A tour guide speaks in hieroglyphs,

Referees at the Original Olympics.