Ancient Life Admirer Gifts

Fish to friend regarding third fish leaving Precambrian ocean: 'There's been no living with him since he started to evolve.'

"Oh, gross! It squished a trilobite!"

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

Anthropologists discover the earliest known depiction of Jazz Hands.

Archimedes statue with a lever

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

Neptune

Hadrian's Wall

'This will be great for chase scenes.'

'I like it but frankly, I had something more substantial in mind.'

Trojan Hurdler.

"No - you’re right. It’s dumb."

Three street vendors sit side by side selling their art; two of the vendors are selling normal paintings while the third is a Neanderthal selling cave paintings.

Egyptian Football

Caveman invents an armchair and his dog sits in it.

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

The discoverer of fire meets the discoverer of marijuana

Goddess of Fertility garden feature

'Gee, I just never get tired of this!'

"And you'll be a man my son!"

"Well, Professor, it translates to, 'I don’t want to work, I just want to bang on the drum all day.'"

Pompeii restoration project.

"Cheer up, grod, these are the good old days."

"Agreed. They were undoubtedly sack religious."

Romulus and Remus

"I get it!"

"Why the hell would you want a bison on your arm?"

"Wow, Grog, fire and drawings. This is quite an entertainment center you have here."

'Whoa...let's not get ahead of ourselves here, Al...'

"I think I'm lost."

"Frieze!"

"Sure, but what have you invented lately?"

"It looks like a pitch for a survival-themed reality show."

Museum.