Ancient Cultures Aficionado Gifts

'Remember - when Daylight Saving Time ends, we have to give everything a slight turn to the left.'

The Pharoh and Moses as Children.

"...and if you add wind-chill factor, the next plague will be even worse!"

"This just in by special delivery. We have skybox seats when they're burning the Christians."

'It's all hand made.'

"So you need money for municipal bribes to get your pyramids rezoned for cemetery use."

"Might I sound a note of caution?"

"There's talk of excommunicating him."

Piles of trash discarded by ancient people are a rich source of artifacts for archaeologists. I unearthed garbage dumps that advanced our understanding of prehistoric societies. On the island of Crete I found ancient trash that increased our knowledge about the Minoan people. And I recently uncovered informative Celtic rubbish. Please stop saying studying ancient cultures by what they threw away is "junk science"!

Platos Republic - 'Jeez! I thought they were deomcrats!'

'I don't know about you but I don't feel very sapiens today.'

Hunters vs. Gatherers

Aztec spring toy.

Egyptian Shrink

"Is this where I sign up for the cross fit class?"

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"Have you been playing dice?"

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

"We're having one heck of a time building that trapezoidal thing of yours..."

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

'The dreaded Anachronisaurus strikes again!'

Those Were The Days

'Evidently, one of them was a cartoonist!'

An ancient Egyptian exhibit at a museum.

"A world without Ovid? I can't even begin to imagine a world without Ovid."

'Et tu Yakamoto?'

'But this is fantastic, professor! It's like no language I've ever seen before!'

Sphinx Comes Alive

"Take that mammoth back. It's not 'wooly' enough."

'What distinguishes man from the lower animals is the ability to make tools.'

Egyptian Football

Egyptian chiropractor.

'I don't care if it's a little storage room for King Tut, you still need a building permit and contractor's license.'

'They're relics of the many ancient civilization that have dwelled at Blisshaven.'

"All right, let's clam up, everybody. Here comes another expedition."