Analog Enthusiast Gifts

"Yes, we still love print, don't we?"

You'll see, Chet; sales will pick up as soon as this whole Internet fad blows over.'

Benefits of Books

Protection from technology

'Real Sex is consensual non-cyber + includes conversation.'

'It's called a 'book'. Apparently it's already downloaded and everything.'

I'm fighting technology with a firewall of ignorance.'

"The fact that you're writing your presentation in giant letters makes me think you still haven't figured out how to use a PowerPoint presentation."

I accidently deleted my hard drive, but it's okay. All the important stuff is on the refrigerator anyway.

"In case of emergency, do you know how to work a pencil?"

"It's nice to just like things without having to LIKE them."

Man chained to a computer reaches for a book.

'If you don't want to go digital, fine, but if you're going to store film in our cooler you have to save room some soda and beer."

The only guy left who's not online.

'But Miss, I've only just got the hang of 'the little hand' and 'the big hand'...'

'Oh no! I've forgotten all the big hand, little hand stuff I learned in school!'

Woman putting correction fluid on a computer screen

"I hate these tablets - when I dine out I want a waiter I can snap at!"

"I prefer the texture of printed books."

Try that with a Kindle

Slow Day at the Editorial Board

"Midtown Vinyl. Vintage albums + EPs. Midtown Ink. Vintage books + newspapers."

This is a 'text book' it's a bit like a website but printed on paper.

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'

I.T. Fear

'It was only 500 yds across but as he visualised the GPS blind spot the risks seemed immense.'

"Our kids may like your giant soundbar, but the neighbors seem to have a different opinion."

"Nice design but you haven't quite mastered the technology!"

Man has thrown his computer aside and is writing on a typewriter.

"We were looking for a non-hackable, energy efficient data center. Thanks for the file cabinet."

'I told you we should have gone wireless.'

Books and Phones

'Stupido Digitale! Chucka me a sloppy brush, there's a gooda chap.'

'He's not a 'bad' phone. He's just not a 'smart' phone.'

'Access to the kids? No. I want access to the audio equipment.'