Amateur Shipwright Gifts

Kid with messed up project in Wood Shop, titled: 'Wouldn't Shop'

On the brink.

'Look Reg, a ship...we're saved!'

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

Titanic: How's my steering.

'Frank, when was the last time you cleaned your gun?'

'Put your tools away. We can't afford to pay any more tradesmen to fix another of your botched DIY projects.'

Model Building

'I'm glad to see you've started building a boat.'

"How long have you felt like a three-masted schooner?"

'My hubby is getting better at D.I.Y. . . . Oh yes, he now spends more on screws than plasters.'

Need tickets.

Becalmed yachts

"I'd like to report this stowaway I discovered two weeks ago, Captain."

Captain Thomas Coram.

"... 'Do it yourself enthusiast'?... No, George is more of a, 'cock it up yourself enthusiast'!"

"Darling! - did you know your books are crooked...?"

"These aren't barnacles. Someone stuck their gum down here."

"Something tells me the Coast Guard isn't coming, Barbara."

Ship

"I don't care how traditional it is. On this ship, it's women and children first!"

"What is this telling us? Amateurs built the Ark. Professionals built the Titanic."

"I knew the woodpeckers were a mistake."

'For heaven's sake; Mrs Van Rensselaer, let go!'

'Just how much time do you intend spending in this new tool shed of yours?'

"Jeffrey makes all our furniture himself."

'It's his wife I feel sorry for.'

"It's a documentary on how they make submarines."

"I'm getting to see REAL ships. Mom's going for some pre-naval care."

"So far we've narrowed the choice of names down to either Fearnaught or HMS Arsekicker."

The Ship's Aground on the Shore...

"What about my name?"