Alternative Lifestyle Admirer Gifts

REPENT! Get back to nature

"That's Fred. He was raised by bats..."

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

Punk Reindeer

'It's going to be a vegan.'

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

The Mainstream

"Wait a minute, is that toad I taste? I told you I've gone vegan, Cynthia!"

"My mom is a vegetarian, so she doesn't bring home the bacon. She brings home kale and quinoa."

'Extinct? Good heavens no. I'm vegan for God's sake.'

'I have one last question: this beach is clothing optional, right?'

"Oh, you silly girl, you! Don't tell me you brought home another husband."

'I wouldn't bother. They're probably gluten-free vegetarians.'

"I'm not a total vegetarian, sometimes I like a bit of buffalo."

"I beg to differ."

"You should consider buying."

'Isn't it romantic, being married in the same alley where we first met eight months ago?'

You and your alternative pregnancy.

"Oh, it's always something now he wants to become a vegetarian."

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

"Now do you believe me?"

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

'We've been tailgating so long, I think we might be homeless.'

'Naw, man! I ain't never worked in no animal hospital...'

"What do you consider your most attractive feature and what are you doing about it?"

Randall shows his support of the tiny house movement...

'I'm kind of a survivalist myself. I roast my own coffee and distil my own gin.'

" Actually, Dear, I said I wanted to start eating 'all natural, not 'au naturel'!"

'It's going to be harder to get back than you think. We're now part of a subculture of a counter culture.'

"My new boyfriend is free range!"

"It's actually an ink stain but my wife has grown quite fond of it."

"I was in corporate sales for years but then I realized, I'm a gatherer not a hunter."

"Accounting has really changed you, Razor-Face."

'This is our last date, Harry. I think I should see other weirdos.'