Alternative Lifestyle Fan Gifts

Crusty Bread

Cafe au Natural.

Man is raking up leaves on a nudist beach.

Punk Reindeer

'Naw, man! I ain't never worked in no animal hospital...'

'We've been tailgating so long, I think we might be homeless.'

'I wouldn't bother. They're probably gluten-free vegetarians.'

"I had the usual religious upbringing, but then I converted."

The Mainstream

'It's going to be a vegan.'

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

"Shower beers? Aisle eight."

REPENT! Get back to nature

"Wait a minute, is that toad I taste? I told you I've gone vegan, Cynthia!"

"My mom is a vegetarian, so she doesn't bring home the bacon. She brings home kale and quinoa."

'Extinct? Good heavens no. I'm vegan for God's sake.'

'This is cow country, pal, and we're not real big on innovation.'

Tough Teddies

"I'm not a total vegetarian, sometimes I like a bit of buffalo."

"Today on Escape to the Country Emily & Oliver are looking for that special little property in the Cotswolds. So what exactly's going to tick all their boxes?"

"I beg to differ."

"Oh, it's always something now he wants to become a vegetarian."

You and your alternative pregnancy.

'I succumbed to pierce pressure.'

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

"What do you consider your most attractive feature and what are you doing about it?"

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

Randall shows his support of the tiny house movement...

" Actually, Dear, I said I wanted to start eating 'all natural, not 'au naturel'!"

'It's going to be harder to get back than you think. We're now part of a subculture of a counter culture.'

'I'm kind of a survivalist myself. I roast my own coffee and distil my own gin.'

'This is our last date, Harry. I think I should see other weirdos.'

"My new boyfriend is free range!"

"As a vegan vampire I suck but I don't swallow."

"Nicole, Kyle, would you guys burn my yearbook?"