Alternative Lifestyle Appreciator Gifts

"Yes, sure, pop round - I've got nothing on at the moment!"

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

Vegetarian Birds

Punk Reindeer

Normal Beard vs. Hipster Beard

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

'It's going to be a vegan.'

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

The Mainstream

REPENT! Get back to nature

"Wait a minute, is that toad I taste? I told you I've gone vegan, Cynthia!"

"You're telling me I should leave the artists' commune that saved me from my stepmother's tyrannical elitism, where I have seven boyfriends, to become the impotent figurehead of another unjust power structure?"

"My mom is a vegetarian, so she doesn't bring home the bacon. She brings home kale and quinoa."

'Extinct? Good heavens no. I'm vegan for God's sake.'

'I wouldn't bother. They're probably gluten-free vegetarians.'

'I have one last question: this beach is clothing optional, right?'

"1972: Kim and Doug invited us to their key party... Sounds groovy! 2017: We just got an evite from Kim and Doug to join them on an ayahuasca retreat in Peru... Tommy starts hockey and my father is about to die—no way."

"Oh, you silly girl, you! Don't tell me you brought home another husband."

"I'm not a total vegetarian, sometimes I like a bit of buffalo."

"I beg to differ."

"You might call it shoplifting officer, but I prefer to think of it as foraging."

You and your alternative pregnancy.

"Do you see what you are doing to your mother?"

'Vegetable proteins sure have caught on. I have to go over to Canyon Gulch and round up a herd of soybeans.'

'Isn't it romantic, being married in the same alley where we first met eight months ago?'

"You should consider buying."

"C’mon, Sara. Like you wouldn’t consider – even for a second – accepting an iPhone from the devil."

"Oh, it's always something now he wants to become a vegetarian."

"What do you consider your most attractive feature and what are you doing about it?"

Naturist Beach - Nudity strictly enforced.

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

The Shy Nudist Camp.

'Naw, man! I ain't never worked in no animal hospital...'

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

'We've been tailgating so long, I think we might be homeless.'