Alcohol Alchemist T-Shirts

Alcohol Ingredients

"One can only hope this is the raw stuff of art."

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

"This brew is quite hoppy - they must of added too much toad."

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."

'Here you are, Simmons!'

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

"I don't know, it's just the whole Dark Ages thing. It's got me down."

'It's an experiment to stop time.'

"Mr Newton, we have carefully reviewed your work in alchemy and have come to one conclusion: stick to physics.'

'Well,we had a good run.' - Worldwide Hops Shortage.

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

'I'm trying to turn gold into gasoline.'

'NEW! Runs on alcohol' 'What a coincidence - so does he.'

'I think that's enough brain defragging for today.'

"You'd be amazed how just a little soybean meal adds to the protein content of powdered bats wing and next tails."

'Why Isaac Newton kept returning to alchemy...' 'There's just no money in gravity.'

'What is wrong with brother Sebastian?'

'Have no fear - I'll have the project completed for you in no time.'

"Of course you can't replicate my experiments. That's the beauty of them."

'Why bother recreating the 5,000-year-old recipe fo the ancient Egyptians, when there's already one that old at the back of the fridge?'

"I was going to transmute it into gold, and then I read that the base metal market has made a remarkable recovery!"

"Garbage in, great books out."

"Ulrich, that's bad science and you know it!"

"Since I've been using this organic stuff my potions are far more effective."

Scientific Tea.

"After all these years, I'm sure of only one thing: when I heat the liquid, it boils."

'I'm trying to transmute lead into a combustible fuel that will produce no smoke.' 'Turning it into gold will be easier.'

Introducing Brocco. The world's first broccoli-flavored liqueur!

"He has a little place in the basement where he's trying to transmute amethysts into antibiotics."

"Your immortality tonic may not be worth it, Sol."

"He's done it your majesty! He's turned lead into a screenplay!"

"Of course you can't replicate my experiments. That's the beauty of them."

Medieval Peer Review: "Whose experiments are the fairest of all?"