Beverage Alchemist T-Shirts

"This brew is quite hoppy - they must of added too much toad."

Circa 1928, The Reese's Candy laboratory.

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

'Needs salt!'

Lightest beer on the market. Carbonated with helium.

"It's less of a spell than it is a signature scent."

'Nobody does curses like Gordon Ramsay.'

"A barista should always follow his instincts."

"Cheer up! There's a magic ingredient that makes it easy to eat vegetables...CHEESE SAUCE!"

'What is wrong with brother Sebastian?'

Molecular gastronomy.

'Why bother recreating the 5,000-year-old recipe fo the ancient Egyptians, when there's already one that old at the back of the fridge?'

Alcohol Ingredients

'You're a nihilist, eh? — well, at least you have something to believe in.'

Scientific Tea.

"Hang on - this one's a Malteser!!"

'We let 65 people try the '03 Malbec and told them they couldn't just describe it as 'good'. The result: 65 said it was 'very good'.'

Scariest Tactics

'While 10-15 years of cellaring are recommended and would certainly improve the bouquet and taste, no, there'sno reason why you can't go out back, behind the dumpster and down the whole thing in 1 chug.'

Mexican Seasoning Mix Mines / Polynesian Sauce Works

"One can only hope this is the raw stuff of art."

I'm not 100% sure it will work...

I finally turned lead into gold, and now my financial advisor tells me he's turned it all back into lead?

"If they gave us lemons, you'd make lemonade, but I'd make limoncello."

The Secret Formula in Coffee

'Remember, the real lemon goes into the floor cleaner and the artificial lemon goes into the lemonade.'

"I've decided - I want to create my own essence."

'The one on the left is a beverage analyst for Huff & Swoon, and the one on the right is a drunk; or is it the other way around?'

'Actually I was trained to be a chemist, but I'm learning fast.'

Alcohol 'Nector of the Gods' 'Devils Brew!'

"Made with pride in our basement."

Red Letter Days - A Promotion

'Not bad -- now let's try it with a twist of lime.'

'Not bad -- now let's try it with a twist of lime.'

'One unexpected problem I've run into, since making my own wine, is finding foods to pair with 160-proof Burgundy.'