Airport Operations Manager Gifts

"I don't know. What do you want to do?"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

TSA Noah

'We will be 3 minutes late taking off. . . the pilot has to piddle.'

The World's Easiest Airport

The Department of Mystery - No one really knows who we are or what we do, including us.

'The massive arrests have made the plans for downsizing much easier.'

In and Out Sourced.

The Scanner Of Love.

Employee of the Month Parking

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

"Sorry, you're only allowed one carrion."

"At least this year she got rid of the seat belts."

Failure/Due Diligence

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

'It's not surprising. The production department is in Spain, the warehouse is in Korea, the accounting division is in Bolivia, the board of directors is in Canada.'

"Of course we'll give you a choice. Would you prefer to lose your job to outsourcing or to robotic automation?"

"The torch is passed, but since the company is going green, I'm passing a high efficiency, solar powered multi LEC prism spotlight."

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

'I dont know about you, but I've got the feeling we're in for long flight delays...'

Disinformation booth.

Attack of the Underwear Bomber

"We're developing a plan to fix this."

Einstein discovers that time can stop completely.

'We're a non-profit organisation. We didn't plan it that way, but that's how it worked out.'