Airport Operations Manager Gifts

"I don't know. What do you want to do?"

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

The World's Easiest Airport

TSA Noah

'We will be 3 minutes late taking off. . . the pilot has to piddle.'

The Department of Mystery - No one really knows who we are or what we do, including us.

'The massive arrests have made the plans for downsizing much easier.'

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

"Sorry, you're only allowed one carrion."

Employee of the Month Parking

Failure/Due Diligence

"At least this year she got rid of the seat belts."

In and Out Sourced.

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

'It's not surprising. The production department is in Spain, the warehouse is in Korea, the accounting division is in Bolivia, the board of directors is in Canada.'

"The torch is passed, but since the company is going green, I'm passing a high efficiency, solar powered multi LEC prism spotlight."

"Of course we'll give you a choice. Would you prefer to lose your job to outsourcing or to robotic automation?"

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

Disinformation booth.

'I dont know about you, but I've got the feeling we're in for long flight delays...'

"We're developing a plan to fix this."

Einstein discovers that time can stop completely.

'We're a non-profit organisation. We didn't plan it that way, but that's how it worked out.'

'I think I found the bottleneck, Boss.'