Agricultural Critic Gifts

'I'm not eating it, not if it's been genetically modified.'

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'Life is great' down on the farm.

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

6 Brothers Falafel

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

"You said the cauliflower is locally grown – would you elaborate?"

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

Newton discovers gravity and apple sauce in the same day.

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

"Rump roast?"

"War is hell and so is this soup."

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

"Maybe if we added some pumpkin spice?"

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

'Needs salt!'

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

"When portions are this huge, I eat half now and the rest in a few minutes."

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

Hashimoto's Restaurant - Sushi Like Mother Used to Make!