Advertisement Dodger Gifts

"So I'm thinking...why bother with all the junk mail?"

Fear of news.

Private Viewing

'For sheer elegance you can't beat the black hole entropy formula.'

Tell me the truth. Do you think my signature is logo-esque?

As the horrible signs began to appear, students would go to any length to avoid seeing them.

Man trying to catch a saxophonist with butterfly wings.

'officially, I'm on leave, but I'm really just ducking the media.'

Election Cancelling Headphones

Melvin would go to any lengths to get away from McDonald's advertising...

"Baldo, I appreciate your hard work...and your eagerness to complete your chores quickly. But next time...don't blow the leaves while I'm painting."

"The answer is NO!"

"Truth, whole truth, nothing but the truth? I'm not ready for that much of a commitment."

"How do I turn off my camera so no one stares?"

"I've had custom reading glasses made that blot out the words 'brexit' and 'royal.'"

'Relax - someone will be looking for us...the Inland Revenue...the T V licence people...'

'We see a lot of carpal tunnel syndrome caused by repetitious pushing of the tv mute button during the political ad season.'

'You better take care of the bill quickly or there's going to be hell to pay.'

"You're suffering from banner blindness."

Cowboy posting notices saying WANTED...FOR FLYPOSTING

"You'll catch her if you're quick. She made a dash for the back door."

"If you don't want to know the result of the united game then look away now"

"You say you have a medical malpractice case?"

Bob worked hard to avoid the spotlight.

'I started out as a sculptor, but I kept hitting my thumb.'

"I'm had a miserable day, so I'd appreciate it if neither of you mention politics, wildfires or COVID."

Leaking Art

"Must...not gaze into...his eye! For I may...never break free!"

Cone of Silence

"We interrupt this endless stream of mind-numbing adverts to bring you a TV programme..."

"I really should call my mother — I just don’t want to talk to her."

A surprisingly challenging resolution. This year my resolution is to leave well enough alone.

"We need to shelter him from all news about economic indicators!"

'I found I'm able to maintain my disposition by not watching any economic or employment news.'

'Maybe he doesn't want to know what's going on in the world.'