Tv Commercial Dodger Gifts

'We see a lot of carpal tunnel syndrome caused by repetitious pushing of the tv mute button during the political ad season.'

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

"It's essential I go to work to avoid being with my family."

"I think before we begin to address me, we need to talk about the clown in the room."

Self-Help Books Families for Lockdown

Examinations.

"Do you ever have days when you can't seem to rise above petty politics?"

Private Viewing

'Now,they're going to teach you to talk, but remember, after you learn how.stay away from religion or politics.'

'For sheer elegance you can't beat the black hole entropy formula.'

Tell me the truth. Do you think my signature is logo-esque?

'Maybe I haven't made myself clear enough. I really don't want to be disturbed today!'

Man trying to catch a saxophonist with butterfly wings.

'officially, I'm on leave, but I'm really just ducking the media.'

"How do I turn off my camera so no one stares?"

"Baldo, I appreciate your hard work...and your eagerness to complete your chores quickly. But next time...don't blow the leaves while I'm painting."

Election Cancelling Headphones

'Relax - someone will be looking for us...the Inland Revenue...the T V licence people...'

"Do you mind? Look what you made me do!"

Bureaucracy (Murphy's law)

"My doctor told me to avoid any unecessary stress, so I didn't open his bill."

"Are you listening to me?"

"Get ready to duck...we're caught in a departmental crossfire."

'If you don't stop interrupting me with your phone calls, we're never going to finish our face to face meeting.'

Man ignores DIY book and instead reads book entitled: 'Get someone else to do it'.

"You'll catch her if you're quick. She made a dash for the back door."

"I'm binge ignoring everything you're binge watching."

"You're suffering from banner blindness."

Cowboy posting notices saying WANTED...FOR FLYPOSTING

Desk plaque: 'Seize the nap.'

'Do you mind? I'm trying to read.'

"If you don't want to know the result of the united game then look away now"

"You say you have a medical malpractice case?"

Bob worked hard to avoid the spotlight.

Inner Sara Skips Out As Zoom Kicks In