Accident Joke Enthusiast Gifts

'As I am writing this, a dozen people are watching me. They think I'm leaving details of my insurance company, but I am not!'

Safety Barriers

"Remember, Mr. Jones, whatever doesn't kill you makes your health insurance premiums go up."

"274 meters of bandage - It looks as though you're going to make the Guiness Book of Records, Mr Henderson!"

The hall of bad ideas.

"I think we can agree that the bridge collapsing is not a good thing."

'Congratulations. You've passed.'

A Not So Grand Slam.

Artists Impression of the first call for roadside assistance...

'How was my emergency stop?'

A sporting gent practising for the hunting season.

Freak Accident Specialist

Cotton candy

'No, no, I've gone through all the steps in the procedure and I don't see anything about totally immersing yourself in oil before starting the job!!

"Call the inspector and tell him to cancel today, that something has come up."

"And hold the mayo."

'It doesn't work...'

Caution Falling Rocks

'Number of days since last accident' a man is falling off of ladder while trying to post numbers...

'Paramedic' 'Doctor' 'Clean underpants man'

'Business has doubled since we organized that women's beach volleyball tournament across the street.'

'He should be okay, it's just a little tap on the head.'

"Well done!"

Rental Car Return. By the way, the airbags worked great!

Concerto for...head-on crash and orchestra.

Two hunters and a near miss

The life of a crash-test dummy

Please Don't Ask...

"Of all the vehicles in heaven and you had to rear-end his car?"

"Please excuse our new employee, sir--he used to work in the circus."

Dinosaur crossing sign.

'-and the look on his face when you overtook him in the Car Wash!'

Mobile library.

'I guess I should have let sleeping dogs lie.'

Sadly, Ralph's third attempt at the World Fishbowl Speed Record was also his last.