Academic Duelist Gifts

"They've decided to resolve the department's conflicting educational philosophies."

When Love In The Laboratory Turns Sour.

What an afternoon. Rudy, listen to me. It didn't mean anything. You can't play Xbox 360 all afternoon with a guy and pretend it means nothing. I was drunk! You loved it - all of it. The racing and arcade games, the first-person shooters, but especially ... No ... WWF Wrestling Smackdown. I'm a married woman!

"Ain't isn't a word, and you know it."

Project Manager Showdown

'Half-time, full-time - It's gone into penalties, woman!'

Wild West Text Showdown

Bring it on, Scrabble nerd! Want to tell him directly? What do you mean? There's a chat function so you can taunt other online Scrabble players. Just type in your insult and hit send. Have I died and gone to heaven? The internet. And I suspect it' met its match.

"The militant hard-liners are making demands, the fanatical zealots are issuing threats, and the moderate centrists are offering suggestions."

Child to another child - 'En garde!'

'The Position's yours, Henderson - But first you must defeat our champion.'

Chefs about to duel with custard pies

Cambridge Dons disagree about the meaning of life.

Political correctness - the early years

"Step 10 paces, turn and post your opinion on facebook."

'You want a piece of me?'

'No matter how much historical research was done, Roger, students who lead juntas have to be disciplined.'

'It's tough having a judge for a father. I'm grounded for 15 months to life.'

"You did have the last word, but this is a new argument!"

"Hockey players no longer fight. They feel saying mean things about each other on social media hurts more."

'I don't believe I've ever seen a scientific paper defended quite as vigorously as this one!'

'You've got your ears shut again, haven't you?'

"What have I told you about shoplifting, son!"

'You srow ze glove in my face?...'

Social Media Attacks.

'Best way I know to decide who gets the research position.'

"You know, you could have just said that you wanted that last piece of pie, dear!"

"This internet forum ain't big enough fer the two of us."

"He's so didactic, and his thinly veiled contempt clearly stems from the diplomacy he employs to keep the class functioning. He's an abominable English teacher!"

Institution of $20,000 plus Tuition Per year Learning

Golfers sword-fighting with golf clubs.

Ski Lift Duel.

Poets Arguing

"You got that many points on a galactic battle? Really? I was beaten by a girl?"

'Uh oh.'