Youthful Mischief-maker Gifts

'All right, who broketh the window!'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

Only a penny! A sensible and ingenious toy for children.

The Queen of Static Electricity: 'Hey, Jeffrey...I've got a physics question for you...The queen of static electricity is exempt! Hail me!!'

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's pimping the wall!'

Teacher to student: 'Nice use of glitter, but you were assigned to do math problems.'

Death Photobombs a Holiday

'How was your day Ma?. . .'

'Your Honor, my client pleads not guilty by reason of a sugar buzz.'

Child jumping on a table-tennis table.

Artist gets pooped on by lots of birds.

Old Golfers never die...only those who get in their buggies way!

"Looks like we left out the wrong brownies."

'... No, actually. He's short, blond and ugly.'

'I'm sorry, I laughed when I saw you in spite of myself!'

'I couldn't put it down... I had peanut butter on my hands.'

'This is coming out of your allowance!'

'My Social Worker said SOCIETY is to blame for my loutish behaviour, which came as an enormous relief to me.'

"I told you we should have given them treats!"

'I got 50p - how much did you get?'

"No, no, no! My old 45 records do not belong in the craft box!"

'Who gave you that black eye?'

"As you can see, we allowed you to bring your cell phones; however, this is hell, so even local calls will be charged as roaming."

'Grandma says she has the perfect wrestler nickname for me. What does Tiny Terror mean?'

"Great, I just made my last mortgage payment!"

"Just think, in dog years we'd be old enough to know better!"

'Norman, why is it you're the one who always gets detention.'

Urine sample

',,,'Sidekick' not a psychic'

"Whoopsie! I accidentally speed dialed the stripper cops instead of the real cops."