Young Mischief Maker Gifts

"Just think, in dog years we'd be old enough to know better!"

'I just got off the phone with your teacher. Next time you tell her you're from a 'broken home' don't forget to mention who broke most of it!'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"Mr. Johnson, Bob is kicking me under the table!"

Only a penny! A sensible and ingenious toy for children.

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's pimping the wall!'

Death Photobombs a Holiday

Teacher to student: 'Nice use of glitter, but you were assigned to do math problems.'

'I couldn't practice last night on account of my Dad's head was gonna' explode.'

'Your Honor, my client pleads not guilty by reason of a sugar buzz.'

Artist gets pooped on by lots of birds.

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

Child jumping on a table-tennis table.

Occupational Hazards.

'In the middle of the second movement, Rodney's worst fears were realized; Phillippe began to sing along.'

"Looks like we left out the wrong brownies."

'You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off. . .!'

Old Golfers never die...only those who get in their buggies way!

"...And I cheated at solitaire...twice."

'I'm sorry, I laughed when I saw you in spite of myself!'

Mozart swimming.

"I'm in the national team...not because I'm a good player, but because everybody panics when I start singing the anthem!"

Timpani for the devil

'All right, who broketh the window!'

'Why are you hiding in the closet?'

'I'd like an older brother, please.'

People, come on, connect the dots...NOT THOSE DOTS!

"And the important thing is to make sure you wake them up EVERY HOUR during the night."

"As you can see, we allowed you to bring your cell phones; however, this is hell, so even local calls will be charged as roaming."

'Who gave you that black eye?'

'Grandma says she has the perfect wrestler nickname for me. What does Tiny Terror mean?'

The concert that never was. . .