Youth Baseball Dreamer Gifts

"Coach said I can be catcher if I gain 30 pounds."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

"When I grow up, I want to go into medicine and help people who can pay out of pocket."

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

"Well, I'm sad for Gloria...she's gonna be bummed out when I'm twice as successful as she is."

'I could do that.'

"Kindergarten, first grade,second grade, third grade...when do we get to retire?"

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

"I'm less a role model than a cautionary tale."

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

"Whaddya want for nineteen mil?"

Reverse Ageing Laboratory

'It wouldn't hurt to say a few words.'

Midnight Basketball

"Look before I leap - always. 'Think' before I leap - never!"

'Push'n 50, but ya still got it!!'

'Now then, Simpkins. What makes you think you could become a circus clown?'

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

'He followed me home, Mom. Can I sign him to a five-year, $80-million contract?..'

"I'm running away to join the W.N.B.A."

'I've decided I'm going to be a fireman when I grow up.'

'This game is going to be a character-building experience.'

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

So close... Yet so far.

Parental Role Model

'If I've calculated correctly, I have two more birthdays before I never have to mow the lawn again.'

'When I'm old enough to vote, I'm going to select Santa Claus as a write-in candidate.'

"Behind the back, between the legs, around my disappointed parents, nothing but net."

Ahhh, spring baseball.

"Okay, if it hits the wall it's a triple, and if it goes through Mr. Baker's window, that's a home run."

'I told my teacher that I won't be returning to school. I'm trying out for a pro basketball team, and her services are no longer required.'

Dog picturing himself on stage.