Baseball Dreamers Gifts

'What I really want for my birthday is a first baseman's mitt, all I get is paper...'

"I was sent down to the minors and from there to Europe, and one thing just led to another."

A bunch of baseball players sitting on a baseball diamond watching TV.

R.I.P. ZZ Top - Dusty Hill 1949-2021

'I hate it when they emulate their major league heroes.'

"Whaddya want for nineteen mil?"

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

So close... Yet so far.

Ahhh, spring baseball.

"Okay, if it hits the wall it's a triple, and if it goes through Mr. Baker's window, that's a home run."

"Your problem is that you live in a fantasy world."

'Yes! How does if feel to be giving birth to a future kicker in professional football?'

A giant diamond hurtles through space toward a population of very conflicted women.

"Coach said I can be catcher if I gain 30 pounds."

'I can just see him twenty years down the road pitching for the Giants.'

Unemployment Office. Apply Here. What type of hourly waage were you thinking about? The pro-baseball type!

Born to rock.

'No, Billy, their first baseman is messing with your head. You won't go to hell for stealing second.'

'Whoa! Really? You offer a full refund on any engagement ring for up to two years?! Very cool!'

'Kid, go out there and play like you're worth 29 million plus signing bonus, buyouts, and endorsement deals. '

"There comes a time, Little Buddy, when you have to just accept that you'll never be famous....that your life will never be adapted for television and that when you die, only five or six people will truly care."

Goldie.

'We're sending you down, Hartnett. You need to work on your scratching and spitting.'

"I'm sorry but Mr. Berrell is in Port St. Lucie trying out for the Mets."

Man without Fingers Playing Guitar

Jack Russell fails to make the cut for a basketball team.

The Five Major Rule Changes in Major League Baseball.

'You can be President when you grow up. I'm going to make a lot of money playing shortstop for the Yankees.'

"Would you explain to your son that there's no free agency in T-ball?"

'My husband wants to see your most expensive diamonds.'

Celebrity anagrams: I'm a rock child me (Answer: Charlie Dimmock)

'I think I just invented 'Rock 'n Roll'.'

"If I'm not in the Hall of Fame by 41 I'm getting induced."

"Winning isn't the only thing, Junior. It's how much money you can get in a pro contract."

'You're behind on every pitch, Billy! Try choking up on the bat!'