Young Philosophers Club Gifts

"I was 13 once. It was hard."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

"Could I ask just one question?"

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

Multi-Generational Books

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN!, 'Boy, talk about psychobabbl!'

"If wisdom comes with age, what are we doing here at eight and a half?"

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

'How much stuff can I get away with and still go to heaven?'

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

Philosopher trading cards.

'After you grade my report, may I have my intellectual property back?'

"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"

"Daddy, instead of the princess story tonight, can you explain how and why manifest destiny eliminated the American Indians?"

"Nicole’s parents celebrated her curious mind, even in those moments when it really depressed them."

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

Young Galileo

Sex Education

"It's one thing for the National Commission to comment on the quality of teaching in our schools. It's another thing entirely for you to stand up and call Mr. Costello a yo-yo."

'He's into Proust as only a child can be.'

The end of innocence

'Grownups are stupid! How can you be good and have fun?'

"I like to consider Third Grade as just another life hack."

"I don't know...but it seems like nothing ever changes around here. It's like we've been 15 years old forever!"

"With great power comes zero responsibility."

'There is NO way I can perform under that kind of pressure!'

'I hardly expected the federal tapering affect my allowance.'

'According to this stop watch I'm not growing up fast enough.'

Biblical Teenager