Yield Seeker Gifts

Junk Bonds - Back Soon - Out Chasing Yield.

"Chasing Investment Yield for Fitness & Profit"

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

A fight in the Boardroom.

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

"Is this the best investment strategy you could come up with?"

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

'1,2,3 4,5,6 7,8,9...'It's the little things that count.(little figurines counting).

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

Soaring Profits

Our Motto: Buy Low Sell High is the Best Revenge.'

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

Three businessmen using a pulley system to change a graph

'I know you're looking for a safe investment but have you ever heard of anyone getting wealthy investing in a bank account?'

"You've changed."

"Who's ready to see what's going to happen in the fourth quarter?"

"The best thing about this, is the lovely honeycomb centre."

"There's gotta be a way to make money off this."

'What kind of filling would you like?'

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

Wearing a sales chart as a name badge.

'Never underestimate the value of pipe-dreams, my son.'

"Football is too dangerous, Junior. Why not follow my footsteps in a safe sport - chasing investment yield?"

"It's not enough being a cat anymore. I want to be a fat cat."

"Before you grade my test, keep in mind, my dream is to become a wealthy doctor, just like my available father"

Business men and women walking around following dollar signs.

Business Outlook

'You're my economic advisor. What'll I do?'

'I took my money out of the bank and put it into municipal bonds...'

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

"I suppose you're wondering why I've summoned you here at 3 AM, minion." "I try not to wonder." "After crunching the numbers, I've determined we'd increase profits by being open 24/7." "We're in the suburbs. Everyone's asleep." "Not true. By being closed at 3 AM, we're missing out on the potentially-lucrative Igor the Wino clientele." "Go to the alley and give Igor a 1-for-the-price-of-2 coupon." "Very bad man."